On Wednesday night I prayed to God to help me in a particular area. The next day I had a meeting and people were sharing different things and my emotions were set off. Somebody had shared how they had success in an area that I hadn’t had success. It seemed like they were able to do it so easily and so effortlessly. I was already in a delicate place so hearing this got me very emotional. If somebody was to say I was feeling jealous I would understand why they would see it that way. For me all I saw was the tremendous effort and time I had spent to get somewhere and had not moved from the starting point. I was wondering why is it that when I put so much effort into somethings there's literally no fruit.
During the meeting I was paired up with somebody else and we talked about our situations. I narrated mine from an emotional standpoint. My colleague was able to highlight just how much I had done and identify three things she needed to do from the things I had done. It was so good to have someone see and understand what I've been doing and use that to encourage me because on that day I really needed it. As humans we are very interesting. While I am seeing my deficiency through somebody else’s success, somebody else is looking at me and the things I have done and seeing their deficiency in the things they haven't done. We're all looking at each other in awe and we forget to look at what we've achieved for ourselves.
After the meeting I prayed. I particularly love how of late whenever something is bothering me, I immediately must talk to God about it. I cried out to God, and I told him how I didn't understand how after all I had done there was still no fruit. After praying I felt this little bust of joy and that took me to the place of knowing that God works things out. An e-mail I received would be a witness to this.
Some weeks ago, I had received a rejection e-mail to a job application. On this day when I was having a bad moment, I received another e-mail from the same company saying they had an unexpected vacancy and were wondering if I would be interested in doing an interview with them seeing as I had already applied before. Look at God! I have never had this happen in my years of working. Of all days it happened on the very day I needed encouragement. The testimony here is that not only does God answer prayer, he knows how to time things to suit the mood you will have on that day, something we can never be aware of. Even though I had prayed about my situation on Wednesday I had no clue how I would really feel on Thursday. God knew and that is why he worked all things out not just for my good but to give me a smile on the very day I needed it.
After reading the e-mail I then remembered this was not the first time such a thing had happened. Some months ago, I was having a bad day and God knocked on my door to say “TPA, I am right here”. For this other incident, I got an offer for a really good opportunity, yet I had not even made an application. God did that to show he really cares about me and he can bring any opportunity my way. The problem is I didn't hold onto that lesson the way I should have. When I made this connection, this made me feel even more better because despite being in my feelings, God blessed me anyway. Isn't God good? He doesn't hold back his blessings. My feelings may be up and down and up and down, but the faithfulness of God is always steady, reliable and ever present.
I should know by now that feelings are liars sometimes. Some weeks ago, I thought to myself how there must be so many things God does for us that we don't see and if we were to see, we would honestly be on the floor weeping. These two scenarios showed that while I was feeling nothing was happening that was a lie. Behind the scenes God is always moving things. In this last scenario I don't know what happened to the person for the vacancy to come up within the space of 2 weeks. All I know is God converted that “No” into a “Maybe”?
The truth is God is always doing good things for me, but I don't see it till later. The day before, I had issues with my car where the key refused to unlock the doors. I had finished a talk and was far from home to go and get the spare key. It was so cold, and I couldn't believe this was happening. I rang my breakdown service who said the key issue wasn't covered in my policy. By this time my hands were frozen despite being in ski gloves (I don't play with the cold). The breakdown service had suggested where I could get the key sorted out. That turned out to be a 45-minute trip from where I was. A trip that would not be guaranteed to be successful because there was a possibility, they may not have what I needed. I debated whether to just go home and get the spare car key, because that would definitely work. I didn’t know what to do. I asked God to help me.
I was due to take my car for inspection that day. I had spoken to the mechanic before; “something” told me to call him again to help me decide what to do. He advised me to look for a phone shop because it sounded like it could be the battery for the key fob. I couldn't see any and decided to go into a small supermarket and ask. I was told there wasn't one nearby and the gentleman asked what the issue was, asked to see the key, and advised me to go to the garage opposite the road and see if they sold the battery there. Google is such a liar because I had looked for garages nearby and it never showed any. The mechanic was very friendly and wrote down, which battery I needed and asked me to go to the garage around the corner. The garage had it, changed it for me and I went back to the car, and it unlocked! Praise God!
Every single person I had interacted with was very helpful and kind. On my way back to the car, I asked God what the purpose of this whole experience was. He just wanted to show me that in my time of need he is there to help. The experience was not to irritate me although of course it did. It wasn't to inconvenience me although of course it did. I was delayed for my inspection appointment and that threw my schedule off not just that day but the next day. There was more to it than the negatives. This is the lesson I am praying I can take for future. If I would have held on to that lesson that day, the next day I wouldn't have been so emotional about another area not working out. Hold on to yesterday’s victory when tomorrow’s loss is lying to you that your victory days are gone.
The next day, I received an email from a lady I had met during the talk, inviting me to collaborate with her and her colleague. Look at God! My testimony is simple. God cares, God Listens, God is working even when your faith is not what you think it should be. Hallelujah! It is impossible to be in any situation that doesn’t bring you joy, and God isn’t doing anything about it, whether you believe he will or won’t. He will help you; he will strengthen you and will uphold you with his victorious right hand. Victory comes in many forms so don’t dismiss it, if it comes dressed in a uniform when you were expecting a Gucci outfit.
What I have seen this week is that God’s favour is dependent on him not me and that is Great news. Based on my feelings and unsteady faith, I don’t qualify for all these good things God is doing for me. But because he is a God of pure love, kindness, and grace, he can’t help but help me, far beyond my wildest expectations. He sees everything we go through and most of all sees where to source what we need; at the very time we need it. He has dominion over everything, and this is how he can dare to bring me opportunities I haven’t even applied for, not once but now for the second time and I believe that won’t be the last! Truly, truly God is Good, God is Great, God is the Ultimate Best!
Related Verses
Isaiah 41:10
Psalm 103:8
Psalm 5:12
Psalm 27:13
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